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Coping with Mesothelioma

Receiving a pleural mesothelioma diagnosis can be difficult to handle. Initially, one may be tempted to disregard the news and avoid conversation with family and friends. However, it is important to keep those who care about you close during this critical stage of life. A person recently diagnosed with pleural mesothelioma will likely need emotional support more than ever.

Breaking the News of a Pleural Mesothelioma Diagnosis

As the patient, you may be in a situation where those close to you know you are undergoing tests for cancer and are anxious to hear the news. In this case, breaking the news may as simple as saying "the tests were positive" or "the doctors were right about their diagnosis." Some people may react by offering any help they can. If this happens, don’t hesitate to receive assistance as they are probably more than willing help.

Other people may react by asking questions about your treatment options or expressing a desire to seek a second opinion. At this point, you may need time to examine your options by yourself, as it is quite common for patients to tell people they need time alone to consider.

If there are children in your life that need to be told, remember to tailor the news to their emotional level of coping. Young children may not need to hear details of treatment or possible outcomes as they may become frightened and ask serious questions. If questions are asked, answer them as simply and honestly as possible without overwhelming them with details. It may help to have another adult with you during the explanation of the news. In some cases, it may be easier for another trusted adult to explain your situation to the children without you being present.

Asking for Support

If you already have a close supportive network of family and friends, don't hesitate to rely on them. Some pleural mesothelioma patients feel they may burden others with their situation and often decide not to ask for help. If you feel this way, remember that your family and friends are truly concerned about you and want to help any way they can.

If you are ready to talk about your pleural mesothelioma diagnosis, speak to those close to you first. Share your concerns with them and give them permission to share theirs with you. You will both feel better if you talk about the concerns related to the recent diagnosis.

Do not feel afraid to ask for practical support, as many people would be happy to go to the grocery store or cook a meal for you. You may also find emotional support outside of your immediate family and friends. Some people find they can discuss their condition better with other cancer patients in cancer support groups. Others find the spiritual and emotional support they need at their house of worship.

Giving Support to a Pleural Mesothelioma Patient

When a family member or friend receives a pleural mesothelioma diagnosis, it can be just as shocking for those around them. If you are in this position, you may find yourself wanting to offer support, but not really sure how to express it. Here are a few things you can do that will make you feel less helpless.

First, ask the mesothelioma patient if they would like to talk about their situation. If they don't feel like discussing it, don't feel rebuffed. Many pleural mesothelioma patients that have recently been diagnosed are in shock and need time to adjust. Any irritation or coldness on their part is probably not directed at you, but rather at the disease. Gently offer to be there when they are ready to talk and keep in close contact with them.

You can also offer emotional support in an indirect way by offering practical support. Grocery shopping, cleaning house or cooking a meal are just some of the ways you can show you care in a concrete way. Saying something such as, "Would you like for me to go to the store for you" or "Would you like for me to babysit the children for you" is frequently a more effective way to offer help. Phrasing the question by saying, "Is there anything I can do" may make the person feel like they are imposing on your schedule. A person will be more likely to accept the help if they know you have the time to do it.

Another way to support a newly diagnosed pleural mesothelioma patient is to help them explore their treatment options. Finding the best place to obtain mesothelioma care can be overwhelming and the patient will greatly appreciate your offer to make phone calls or perform research. Being proactive about finding emotional support can dramatically help the patient develop a good support network and can help you both deal with this trying time.

If you would like assistance with finding treatment options or additional support resources, please call 1-800-381-1772 to speak with a Patient Advocate or simply fill out the form on this page to receive an informative packet in the mail.

Sources

1. http://www.cancer.org/docroot/ESN/content/ESN_2_1x_Breaking_the_News_About_Your_Diagnosis.asp?sitearea=ESN
2. http://www.cancerhelp.org.uk/help/default.asp?page=4599